I hope I speak for many readers of the list when I express how much I
enjoy the occasional outrageous or hallucinatory bird report. Reality
can be so boring. Let's not be too solemn, and admit how much fun it is
to read a report that a person could casually report seeing three
species new to the state list in a single day not devoted to birding,
all the while forgetting to use the camera in his pocket!
        This kind of humor is not for beginners, however. There is always the
possibility someone might take a poorly-conceived faux sighting too
seriously. For example, if you are going to report a Sabine's gull for
Ohio in April (there is after all only one accepted April record, of a
single bird), you run the risk of incurring the wrath of birders who
believe you, then travel long distances. The best thing to do is to
report huge numbers of this rarity, at least 50 of them.
        You can also tick off birders--rather than birds--if you don't seem to
realize how rare the birds you report actually are in these parts. If
you offhandedly say you visited Lake Lalala today, make a big deal of
having seen a bald eagle, and add that you saw:
        250 mallards
        30 hooded mergansers
        2 smews
        150 American coots
        13 redheads
        26 ruddy ducks
a few readers might not get the joke, and are going to waste a day
scanning old Lalala for smews. So in this case, report a mated pair with
nine smewlings!
        We all enjoy the occasional bizarre imaginary sighting to interrupt
reports of the expected, but it's best to make it clear you're kidding!
Bill Whan
Columbus



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